Man Makes Strong Case For Midweek Pints

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DUBLIN man Shane Cassidy has put to his wife a well-rounded, compelling argument as to why he should go for a few pints in his local tonight, despite the fact that it’s only Wednesday.

Citing three days at work which have been “pure bastards”, Cassidy attempted to convince his wife Shireen that he deserved at least an hour in the pub, adding that he would “go early, and be home early” and have two pints, three at the most.

Further mitigating factors such as the humid weather and the fact that he hadn’t been to the pub since Saturday evening also factored into the Phibsboro native’s case.

“He’s made some good points, and promising to bring home chips was a smart move,” said Constance Guilroy, relationship expert currently observing the ongoing situation at the Cassidy house.

“Giving himself a set deadline to be home at may come back to bite him in the end, but aiming to be out of the house before Emmerdale starts should give him an hour and a half in the pub before the end of Eastenders, meaning that Shireen will be too distracted to complain about him being gone”.

Cassidy’s trip to the pub is currently still up in the air, as his wife has countered his strong points with her own counterargument, which has involved several mentions of “the last time”.

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