America Celebrates Its National Holiday

UNDER sunny blue skies that hinted at an air of spring, thousands of Americans lined both sides of Manhattan’s Fifth Avenue this afternoon waving flags to mark the country’s national holiday, April Fools day.

Led by US president Donald Trump, the colourful ticker tape parade marched slowly through the New York streets to the cheers of spectators hoping to get a glimpse of passing floats – commissioned by various corporations and organisations in the city.

Today marks the 334th year since the death of the Untied States’ patron saint, Saint April Fools.

“As you can see there is a huge turnout for this year’s event,” mayor of New York Bill de Blasio told WWN.

“I think Saint April Fools would be proud if she was alive today. It’s great to see such a huge catalogue of people enjoying the spring sunshine.”

Saint April Fools, who died in 1681, was anointed as patron saint of America in 1862. Sister Fools, originally from Spain, travelled to the free world in 1664 to help convert native Americans to Catholicism, and soon became famous for her generosity and meat sandwiches, which she later coined ‘hamburgers’.

“She invented the burger as we know it today,” explained historian David Humphries. “Saint April Fools was a good woman that helped the sick and fed the poor. Native Indians called her ‘Kaka Koo Choo’, which translates ‘pear hips’ in English. She was also a bit of a joker and liked to play pranks on patients by hiding their money and goods for long periods of time”.

It is understood the popular saint died of coronary disease at the ripe old of 38, believed to be caused by her high protein diet and lack of vitamins.

Some 200 years later, American President Abraham Lincoln sent a letter to the Pope Pius IX asking him to anoint the saint as patron saint of America. The Pope accepted his request later the same year.