WWN’s Definitive Top 5 Father Ted Episodes

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WE here at WWN might differ from a lot Irish websites as we are just Ted mad! Sometimes we even quote some of our favourite lines out loud for a bit of a laugh but hey that’s just us.

Careful now, haha, but we have meticulously crafted the definitive list of the greatest ever Fr. Ted episodes. We won’t please 100% of fans with these choices but we know you’ve already clicked because we wrote ‘Father Ted’ in the title and that’s all that matters.

5 – The one where Ted is arrested for murder.

Initially disliked by Ted fans, this hour long episode has grown in stature over the years. Gardaí investigate the apparent murder of Fr. Larry Duff after he is found at the bottom of his stairs clutching his phone. The finger of blame points itself at Ted after he first denies knowing Larry all that well only for Dougal to point out Ted is always saying how Larry is tremendous fun. A riff of the then movie of the moment The Talented Mr. Ripley, it remains Fr. Ted’s biggest departure for the sitcom structure.

4 – The one where Dougal speaks at the UN.

The gang find themselves jet-setting in to meet the Pope in Rome then travelling with him around the World after winning a competition on Radio Vatican. Due to a typically Ted-esque mix up (who could forget how Ted couldn’t work out how to set Pope John Paul II’s alarm clock correctly), Dougal is ushered in by the Vatican’s PR man to speak at UN about the sexual abuse of children by priests after the Pope sleeps in. Dougal inadvertently agrees to make the Catholic Church liable for all compensation to victims, and goes as far as admitting the church was wrong. Oh Dougal!

3 – The one where Mrs Doyle becomes a prostitute.

After the church collection money goes missing (here’s looking at you Fr. Todd Unctious ya gas bastard!), the Craggy Island parish is once again facing a funding shortfall. Mrs Doyle takes to the mean streets of Craggy Island and has no shortage of customers, raising enough money to save the parish over the course of a brief 6 months in the sex trade. John, of John and Mary fame, pleads with Mrs Doyle to leave the island with him for a new life together after he becomes a returning customer. However, Ted confronts her in the show’s most tense scene simply saying ‘time to come home and make tea again Mrs. Doyle’.

2 – The one where Jack gets Alzheimers.

Fr. Ted was never short of a few laughs, but by God did it make us all cry big man tears when Fr. Jack was diagnosed with Alzheimers. Dougal, rarely known for his insight or perception noticed Jack shouting ‘girls’ at his bottle of Henneseys which was just out of reach while also shouting ‘drink’ at the TV which had the famous lesbian scene from Brookside playing on it at the time. A trip to Dublin in the car to meet with doctors is simultaneously heartbreaking and hilarious as Jack is convinced he is going to Mosney.

1 – The one where Ted gives Jack his liver.

No list would be complete without the most controversial episode of Fr. Ted ever. Jack, after years of alcohol abuse, is facing his 5th liver transplant. With every priest on the island for the 4th annual Priest Olympics, all eyes are on Ted when it’s revealed he is a match for Jack as they’re both O negative. Ted agrees to a liver transplant, but in a rare relapse into his selfish ways he chickens out, sending Dougal out to the black market to buy a liver from Tom. Disaster strikes as Dougal incorrectly buys an O positive liver and Jack dies on the operating table. The next episode would of course see actor Frank Kelly return as Jack’s twin brother and fellow priest Jim.

Disagree with the list? Think the one where Dougal finds out Ted is his father or the one with Fr. Damo overdosing on heroin should have made the list? Or what about when Dougal killed Bishop Brenna? Let us know in the comments. The person with the best answer could be in line for a golden cleric LOL!!!

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