Renewed Calls For Michael Lowry Voters To Be Rounded Up And Shot

THERE has been renewed anger up and down the country today over the ongoing existence of Michael Lowry supporters who continue to vote for the disgraced TD, following yet another embarrassing incident last week.

Mr. Lowry passed a note to Mr. Kenny in the Dáil chamber last Wednesday in which he asked the Taoiseach to consider re-appointing Valerie O’Reilly, one of his former press advisors, who he claimed in the note was ‘bright, intelligent and not bad looking either!’

“Seriously, who keeps voting this clown into office?” asked just about every other person in the country today. “That man has evaded tax, received bribes from major business men who, may we add, still operate in Ireland without interruption.

“He lied under oath numerous times at the Moriarty tribunal and is now engulfed in yet another cronyism scandal involving Ms. O’Reilly, who he clearly wants reappointed to a State board.”

The majority of the Nation has also criticised the media for reminding them that Mr. Lowry himself still exists, and remains part of Irish political life.

Speaking to Tipp FM this morning, Mr. Lowry said the comment was “light-hearted” and was taken out of context, just like that time when he jokingly said he didn’t have off-shore bank accounts, when he actually did.

“The press and Labour party have been out to get me since day one,” defended the 61-year-old Tipperary man, who also has a substantial business portfolio and connections to horse racing businessman John Magnier. “At least my dedicated voters believe in me, and that’s all that matters.”

On accusations of chauvinistic and sexist conduct Mr. Lowry politely asked the interviewer to “relax there honey, no need to get your knickers in a twist. All that frowning will give you wrinkles”.

Following the radio interview, several listeners suggested rounding up Mr. Lowry’s voters and shooting them, before the next general election.