12 Things No One Ever Told You About Living In Ireland

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SHORT of breath? Feeling nauseous and dizzy? Well, that’s probably because you haven’t read a single amazing and unique list in the last 10 minutes. Fear not as WWN brings you the 12 incredible things no one ever told you about living in Ireland.

1. Ireland changed its name to East America in 1978 for one year in an attempt to attract American investment.

2. We’re the land of saints and scholars, and proudly so. But what you probably don’t know is that there are many poets and writers that exist in Ireland who aren’t on the Junior and Leaving Certificate syllabuses.

3. 93% percent of the male population in Ireland is named Séan, Patrick, John or Conor while just 14% of women are named Sean, Patrick, John or Conor.

4. The east of coast of Ireland was largely populated by organised gangs of megalomaniacal seagulls prior to human settlement.

5. B*witched are Ireland’s most popular band, selling over 1.4 billion singles with every person in Ireland owning over 147 copies of ‘C’est la Vie’ each.

6. According to your Grandmother nothing bad ever happened in Ireland when she was growing up so just stop fucking asking, will ya?

7. Any form of cattle is considered legal tender, meaning you can pay for clothes, meals, houses or a few beers with a cow or a sheep. Banks however, stopped their policy of allowing customers to store their cattle in bank vaults in 2003.

8. Despite our obvious obsession as a nation with property you may not know that the Irish media went a whole day without mentioning houses on the 23rd of May in 1989.

9. It is still illegal to become a politician unless you sign a contract promising to attend at least 100 funerals of local constituents you’ve never met every year.

10. While it may blow your mind to discover this – everything in Ireland is, to some degree, so so Irish, remember this at all times.

11. The official mascot of Ireland is a small, impoverished child being beaten with a stick and not a cheery leprechaun as many people mistakenly believe.

12. Anything that occurs in Ireland that has been recognised by America in any way is automatically 170% better as a result.

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