Scientists Reach End Of What Can Be Learned From Water Balloons Bursting In Slow Motion

AFTER nearly five years of painstaking research, scientists have announced today that they have learned all they can from filming water balloons bursting in slow motion.

With the dawn of the Phantom, an affordable, portable high speed camera, scientists around the globe raced to find kickass things that would look awesome in super slow motion.

In the following years, a slow motion water balloon race kept the world’s greatest physics and chemistry experts working day and night to find new reasons for why they were spending all their funding on water balloons and the latest high speed equipment.

However, researchers at the Slow Motion Video Center in Los Angeles, California issued a statement this morning admitting that there was nothing more to be gained from water balloon popping experiments, and thanked the thousands of people worldwide who contributed to the study for the past five years.

“They have been five very productive, water-soaked years, but today we have to stand back and admit that there is nothing more to garner from the study of water balloons bursting in slow motion.” said Francois D’Augustin, chief of research for the International Slow Motion Video Agency.

“We’ve done every possible permutation; water balloons filled with coloured water, two water balloons at once, water balloons falling on the ground, water balloons hitting people in the face… And I think I speak for us all here when I say that we’re all very proud of the amount of views our YouTube channel has amassed”.

A one-paragraph dossier, compiling what was learned from years of bursting water balloons in slow motion, is expected to follow shortly.