Barcelona Make Bid For Dublin Forward Eoghan O’Gara

Following allegations of biting made by the Meath team against a Dublin player, FC Barcelona, one of the world’s premier soccer teams, has expressed an interest in the player at the centre of the storm, Eoghan O’Gara.

Barcelona look set to continue a carefully considered approach of buying players who show a desire to bite opponents while simultaneously forgetting what they actually need is about five or six elusive things known as defenders.

A fiery encounter between Meath and Dublin caught the attention of the Catalan giants only after reports emerged that a biting incident had supposedly occurred.

“We would only pay €40 million this time, we are not crazy,” explained Barcelona president Josep Maria Bartomeu.

Barcelona look set to secure O’Gara’s services, but there is one stumbling block currently in the way: Barcelona are seeking confirmation that O’Gara is indeed a biter, something Dublin as of yet, refuse to confirm.

Dublin have remained silent on the matter following their ninth Leinster title in ten years, as they are waiting on the match report from the referee.

This technique is known as ‘waiting to see if we actually got caught’, which involves a complex combination of keeping your mouth shut until such time as you can ascertain whether or not you have been caught red handed, or in this case, sinking your teeth into an opponent.

Many GAA fans who condemned Suarez for biting an opponent, branding him everything from ‘a disgrace’, ‘fucking idiot’ and ‘a right bloody looper’ have rounded on O’Gara too, criticising him by claiming ‘oh shut will ya, GAA is a man’s game, it’s grand. Shit happens.’