Waterford City Mayor Calls For Regional Holiday As County Tops Alcohol Abuse List

WATERFORD CITY Mayor, Cllr. James Simmons has called for a regional holiday to celebrate the county topping Ireland’s alcohol abuse list this week.

It was estimated that more than 40,000 people in Ireland needed treatment between 2008 and 2012, with Waterford having the highest number of new cases per head of population.

“This is a stunning achievement,” said Mr. Simmons today at a special sitting at city hall earlier. “On behalf of the city I would like to thank our education system for failing our children. Our directors Bertie Ahern, Charlie Haughey and Enda Kenny for ignoring our city to the point of extinction. And I would also like to give a special thanks to the banking institutions of Ireland. Without them, none of this would have been possible. Thank you all.”

The Mayor proposed an annual bank holiday to mark the announcement, stating it will become a day of celebration for years to come.

“This has put Waterford back on the map again.” he added, holding an Alcohol Abuse trophy. “This is better than any crystal we could ever carve.”

The city and county has become one of the most forgotten about regions in Ireland since 2008, boasting the highest unemployment rate on the island.