Responsible Drinking Campaign ‘Pointless’ This Weekend, Admits Drinkaware

“Might as well change it to Drink away” spokesperson for the consumer information provider, Sandra White told WWN today.

These comments come as the country is staring down the barrel of a weekend of suspected binge drinking and excessive debauchery in celebration of the feast day of Patron Saint and Snake Exterminator, Saint Patrick.

Ms. White has confessed that Drinkaware is “fighting a losing battle” in convincing the public to “take it handy” this coming long weekend.

Drinkaware.ie is an initiative which began in 2006 with the intention of promoting responsible drinking and opposing anti-social drinking behaviours. Both of which look set to be largely ignored.

Campaigns for previous long weekends have been relatively successful, but hopes for a similar success this year have been dashed. The prospect of the Irish rugby team winning the Six Nations Championship combined All Ireland Club Football and Hurling finals could be the catalyst for a massive surge in alcoholism.

Leading alcoholic, Boylesy has claimed this as a victory for winos everywhere and, is excited at the possibility of not being the most inebriated in the pub or at least that is what WWN assumed Mr. Boylesy’s slurring indicated.