Groundbreaking New Drug Treatment For Suffering Emo’s


ONE in three Irish people know someone with a teenage Emo son or daughter a new survey has revealed, but in many cases it takes up to 14 years before teens are diagnosed with this debilitating illness.

Emoism is now the “single biggest public health issue” in Ireland but is still neglected and stigmatised, Professor Darren Walsh of Trinity college Dublin said yesterday.

The new survey, which was carried out by several men in neatly ironed pants, showed one in three people know someone with the mental illness, and 60pc know someone with ‘those tell tale signs’.

New research suggests that early diagnosis may be key in fighting the disorder.

Emoism coincides with the first stages of puberty. The sufferer usually starts by self harming the hair follicles, franticly attacking them in a desperate bid for attention. Most Emo’s dye the hair a dull shade of black. Although, some early stage sufferers keep a white or pink streak – probably to help remind themselves of happier times in the real world. The hair itself is usually swept over one eye to symbolise the wearers disregard for 3 dimensional space. This, Dr Walsh says, is one of the first stages of the disease.

“We need to catch it early. If it progresses to the later stages it will be very difficult to treat. When one is accustomed to a 2 dimensional lifestyle it is very hard to turn back.

It is usually too late for the Emo sufferer when he/she/it starts wearing slim-fit jeans, and horribly tight t-shirts with obscure band names printed on them.”

Dr Walsh also asks parents to keep their ears peeled for over-used words like Mainstream, melancholy and forsaken or phrases such as ‘Every tear tells a story’, ‘I hurt myself so you can’t’ or ‘I carved your name on a bullet so people would know you were the last thing to go through my head.’ .

If Emoism is left untreated it can lead to severe health and social problems including pretending to cut wrists with blunt objects, crying like Peter Andre, self sexual abuse, excess fringe acne and even permanent blindness in one eye.

However with proper management and treatment sufferers can lead productive lives as broadcaster Pat Kenny has already proven in the past.

Emo’s often do serious damages to their relationships and careers during these bouts which recur periodically and are usually followed by an even more ‘needy’ depressive phase, Dr Walsh said.

“This disorder can be treated without drugs. But it does need to be caught early.” he said.

Dr Walsh was speaking at the launch of Gleemo, an anti-psychotic drug produced by Beechams which has just been licensed for treating Emoism in Ireland.

It was found that many of the older methods of treating the disorder, such as beating them with studded belts and locking them under the stairs for long periods of time, cause severe side effects.

‘The new drug Gleemo has much reduced side effects for treating Emos’, he said.

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